Do rules about how to use commas
make you turn purple? No wonder! Let’s see if we can make them easier. Commas are a relatively recent
invention. When the Romans first started writing things down, they didn’t have
punctuation marks. They didn’t have spaces for that matter, or lower case
letters. SOALLTHEIRWRITINGLOOKEDLIKETHISOBVIOUSLYTHATWASAPROBLEMFORTHEPOORGUYWHOHADTOREADIT Just as spaces showed a reader when
one word stopped and another started, so commas told a reader when to pause and
take a breath. They were especially welcome when sentences grew longer than “Me
hungry. Kill deer.” Try reading this sentence out loud:
“At the grocery we bought the following items: peas and carrots and macaroni
and cheese and chicken and dumplings.” Obviously you need to replace some
of the "and"s with commas, but which ones? That will depend on how many separate
items appeared on the cash register tape. Did you buy peas, carrots, a box of
dry macaroni, a package of cheese, a whole chicken, and some frozen dumplings
for a total of six items? Or did you buy three: peas and carrots, macaroni and
cheese, and chicken and dumplings? Read the two versions aloud and listen for
the differences. Other comma rules apply to things
like appositives, direct address, and restrictive versus nonrestrictive
clauses. You won’t need such esoteric terms if you apply the pause rule.
Consider this scenario. A fire occurred in the middle of the night at a rooming
house where several men were living. Deaths resulted. How many died? “The men who were asleep died in
the fire.” (The sleepers died. The poker-players did not.) “The men, who were
asleep, died in the fire.” (They were all asleep and they all died.) Listen for the pauses. Add commas. As an aside, academics sometimes
argue over what is called the Oxford comma. That’s the one that appears before
the final “and” in a series. When I read a series of terms (like pens,
notebooks, pencils, and erasers), I hear a pause after pencils, and I always
use the Oxford comma. In other words, I follow my own rule about hearing
commas. You may, however, encounter an editor who thinks that extra comma is
not only unnecessary but adds an extra expense—one likely to drag the publisher
into instant bankruptcy. She will tell you that a comma takes the place of a
conjunction, so you never need both. My advice? Don’t waste your breath on an
argument in which both sides are right. Gracefully bow out, taking your Oxford
commas with you. (Because editors always win.) If you want to read more, these sections come from The Second Mouse Gets the Cheese, now available in a Kindle edition for only $2.99. |






